There’s nothing particularly dodgy about the sex industry. But in an industry where there are a lot of people working, some people are going to conduct themselves professionally, and others might not. And it’s YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to do your research, before you hire someone.
Today I’m answering the question ‘how can I tell if my escort is professional?’ But first, I want to ask you a question.
Do you think the sex industry is dodgy?
Lots of people do. They see what goes on in movies or on TV, they read stuff in the papers, and they assume that sex work, and escorting, is shady, illegal, run by people who lack education. They assume that escorts are out to rip you off, they they’re cynical or like, cold and selfish people who don’t really care about their clients. and they assume that anyone who sees a sex worker is either a creep, or totally desperate.
If this is the way you think, stop right there! In Australia, escorting is more or less a legal profession, and sex work is really legit job for people of all genders, all over Australia. It’s a business and the people doing sex work are business people. And a lot of us genuinely care for our clients, and we also plan to stick around for a long time, so we’re careful to treat everyone fairly. I know lots of workers who are very smart businesspeople, and who take their jobs incredibly seriously.
Now, I’m not saying that everyone in the sex industry is one hundred percent professional. Think of it this way – if you wanted to hire someone to fix something around your house for you, for example, you’d want to be pretty careful about who you chose to do the job. It’s a lot of money, and a big responsibility.
You might end up with a good tradesperson who shows up, quotes you a fair price, and gets the job done on time. Or, you might end up with a dodgy tradie who misses appointments, keeps charging you extra, and leaves a huge mess.
It doesn’t mean that all tradesmen are dodgy, right? It just means that in an industry where there are a lot of people working, some people are going to conduct themselves professionally, and others might not. And it’s YOUR RESPONSIBILITY to do your research, before you hire someone.
The same applies to escorts. It’s your job to decide if the person you’re interested in seeing is professional, before you commit to seeing them.
So how do you do this?
I’m going to tell you a specific number of steps that I recommend for checking out the escort you want and making sure you do your homework. If you do this stuff, you’ll be a long way towards feeling confident that they’re a good bet.
1. Check how well-written their ads are – you should be looking for someone who is clear about what they offer, uses professional language, and has clear photos. I know it’s easy to get distracted by all the pics of boobs and butts and whatever, but it’s important to pay attention to the words. No matter how good someone looks, they still need to be professional, honest and up-front.
2. Look for reviews/testimonials – and I don’t recommend you necessarily read the reviews, okay? I’ve had clients say to me ‘but the escort will only publish positive testimonials, so what’s the point of reading them?’ And I don’t actually recommend reading them. You can’t always believe a positive testimonial – you have no way of knowing how true it is. And the same goes for negative reviews – t’s super easy for a bad client to leave a bad review as revenge, so it’s not necessarily a sign that the escort has done anything wrong.
Check out how many testimonials or reviews they have. If an escort has a lot (and they’re mostly positive) it’s a sign that a) they’ve been around for a while, and b) a large number of people liked them enough to bother writing something. Someone with a high number of testimonials might be a safer bet than someone with none.
3. Follow the escort on Twitter or Switter – this is great for sussing out what sort of personality an escort has. People tend to show their true colours on social media, especially if you follow them for a while! You can also check their selfies, to compare to their professional pictures, if you’re worried that they won’t look the same as their ad photos.
4. When you’re ready to meet them, I recommend sending a booking request and seeing how professional their reply is. That means how quickly they get back to you, how clearly they state their services, and how well they answer any of your questions. At this point you don’t want to waste their time – so you do need to be fairly committed to following through with the booking when you message them. But it is one last opportunity to back away, if the reply you get is unprofessional or if you feel like they’re not being up-front about fees or services.
Now, just before I go on, it is important to note that sometimes we can’t be up-front about services, depending on the laws where we’re located. For example, you can’t really ask directly about incalls in Victoria, and in South Australia and Queensland there’s a whole load of stuff we can’t talk about. Keep that in mind, if there’s a specific question or a specific service that no escort seems to want to discuss with you. It might not mean they’re unprofessional, they might just be covering their asses from a legal point of view.
5. And finally, here’s an idea for your first session together. For the first booking with a new escort: do a coffee date, social date or shorter session. This allows you to find out whether you get along, without spending a lot of money. Different escorts might offer different sessions for this – and some don’t offer shorter sessions, in which case you’re out of luck. but if there is the opportunity to do a social date or short date first, it’s a really good investment. Once you know that you both get along, you’ll feel more confident about spending big bucks on a longer date.
Seeing an escort can be a risk – not just with your money, but also with your emotions. There are lots of top-notch, professional escorts out there who can give you what you need. But don’t trust to luck – do your homework. That way you’ll know you’ve done your absolute best to ensure a good escort date.